Toddler Wearing Tips from a Military Mom Abroad

When I had my son, my husband and I were stationed in rural Germany (thanks, Air Force!). I’ve often shared the story of how much babywearing saved me when my son was tiny, because my husband deployed shortly after he was born and didn’t return until he was almost 9 months old.

And it’s true - I’m not sure how I would have survived those early days without babywearing. It boosted my confidence, got me out of the house, and kept me out of the dreaded contact “nap trap” so I could pee whenever I needed to.

But what I haven’t shared as much about is that babywearing continued to be an important part of our life well past the baby stage - in fact, I think I actually wore my son more as a toddler and preschooler than I did when he was a true baby!

If you’ve never lived in Europe before, let me tell you - it is not a stroller-friendly place. Many streets are still cobblestone, buildings are old with narrow staircases, and most of the best historical and cultural sites are cramped spaces when empty, much less when flooded with tourists.

We wanted to make the most of our time in Germany, to get out and see the sights…but taking a stroller on trains, jangling down bumpy streets, and past glaring strangers in crowded cathedrals was absolutely NOT on my bucket list. Not to mention my postpartum OCD made me hyper-focused on my son’s naps - skipping them for a day trip was not an option my brain could handle.

Enter toddler wearing!

With my son safely in a carrier, traveling and sight-seeing was a total breeze. We never had to negotiate who would stay with the stroller while the other went on, never had our arms wear out from carrying a heavy toddler who wasn’t able to walk on his own for hours at a time. He was safe on our bodies in crowded places, up high where he could see and point and comment on what was going on around us. Sharing those experiences with him up at my level was so special…and even if he doesn’t remember it, I always will.

And the naps! I was used to contact naps from his newborn days, and the carrying allowed us to take that familiar comfort on the go. My husband and I could keep going while he snoozed happily in the carrier - it was so incredibly freeing.

We never had to worry about wrangling a folding stroller in the airport and hoping it wouldn’t get damaged in the cargo hold. If we had a short connection, we could hustle as fast as our legs could carry us without worrying about my son getting tired. And when staying put in a seat just wasn’t happening, I could easily walk and soothe my son to sleep in the aisles while still being able to steady myself during the occasional jolt of unexpected turbulence.

Now that we’re back in the states, wearing my kids as they’ve grown bigger has continued to be our go-to - we wear on hikes, zoo trips, to calm tantrums, and to keep our “runner” safe in parking lots and crowded spaces. My kids bring me their favorite carriers in everyday moments when they just need to be close - even at 6 and 3 years old.

Toddler wearing isn’t the same as babywearing was - it requires negotiation and partnership, it demands mindfulness around your body and how you move, and the carriers I loved when they were babies aren't the ones I reach for now.

But it also brings a different kind of joy than those sleepy newborn snuggles did - one in which your child can participate in your world, and you get a front row seat to their curiosity, joy, and wonder.

So if you’re wondering when your child will “outgrow” babywearing completely…well, I’ll let you know when it happens.

It takes a lot longer than you think.